Thursday, April 8, 2010
Finding out that you are pregnant when you weren't planning it can come as quite a shock to the system. Wondering if you COULD be pregnant when you aren't planning it can be even worse! Pregnancy came as a big surprise to me. I remember being in the car, in the passenger seat, and feeling very car sick ( which I never get) and for no reason whatsoever, it dawned on me - I'm pregnant. Now, let me back peddle a little here...I had no reason to believe that pregnancy was even a possibility for me, since my husband had had a vasectomy, but there I was. Woman with baby on board. Which brings me to my first point. Never assume it's not possible.
The only way to be absolutely sure to avoid getting pregnant is abstinence. No other form of birth control works one hundred percent of the time. Many are close, but nothing is completely guaranteed. Birth control pills are great, but only if you take them at the same time every day. Even then, you've only minimized the risk. Not too mention, taking additional medicines like antibiotics can completely counter act the pill and the effects you were hoping for. Condoms, forget about it. I can't even tell you how many condom babies I know...There are so many variables there....did you put it on properly and on time ( right at the start!)? Did it come off at any point? Did it break? A lot can go wrong here. Oh, and my favorite - the pull out method. Who's still using that one?! I love when guys insist that they've got you covered...they don't! There's such a thing as pre-cum and it is just as capable of making a baby....
Now, supposing you had a condom break or even worse, had unprotected sex all together. Even if you think that you are aware of when you usually ovulate, are you taking into consideration that sperm can actually live inside of you for several days and wait for you to ovulate?! Didn't think so....
Should you at any point in time become suspicious about what is going on with your body, take the time to pay attention to it. Have you gotten your period on time? If not, don't stress. It is entirely possible that you have freaked yourself out so much that your body is in freeze mode and your period will likely remain a no show until you relax. However, if you are getting your period, but something still seems off, you need to consider the fact that you can have period like spotting all through out your pregnancy and you don't want to confuse the two.
So, you have gotten to the point where you are taking a pregnancy test and it comes back negative, but your period still remains out of sight. It's time to make an appointment with your doc. Some women will only show up pregnant on a blood test, so no matter how many times you pee on that stick, it is not going to give you an honest answer. If you peed on the stick and it showed up with a little plus sign in the window - Congratulations - you are going to be a Mommy!
Take a moment, or two...take as long as you want - You've got nine months! As surreal as it seemed to me to be pregnant, it all became very real and even exciting once I could feel my daughter moving around in my tummy. It's OK to be scared or even angry, if this wasn't a part of your plan. Feel whatever you feel and allow yourself to adjust to this situation...and when you're ready - make a new plan!